I was probably 11 or 12 years old when I published my first blog. I made it myself with HTML and it had music playing and stars (or maybe hearts) following the cursor.
I don't remember what I was writing about. What I do remember is that I didn't care at all if people would ever read or like it.
I had a blog because I liked the idea of having a page on the internet that was mine and that I could do whatever I wanted with it (including making stars or hearts follow the cursor).
Eventually my dad found my blog. He thought I was too young to expose myself on the internet so he made me delete it.
Since then, I had countless attempts to re-start a blog but I never really did it. I guess I became too aware of what my dad meant and I was afraid of it.
"Do I have something relevant to say? Will anyone read my blog? What if my writing/grammar/spelling is not good enough? What if people read and dislike it? What if people disagree with me? What if I suck? What if I'm not good enough? There are enough blogs out there already. No one needs mine."
I missed the point. All those years that I kept myself quiet I missed the point.
“Do whatever brings you to life, then. Follow your own fascinations, obsessions, and compulsions. Trust them. Create whatever causes a revolution in your heart.”
― Elizabeth Gilbert, Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear
My dad was right - two decades ago I didn't understand much the risks of posting on the internet. I was very naive. But at least I understood the power of doing something simply because I liked doing it. I wasn't focusing on the results, I was focusing on the joy of the journey.
Maybe - just maybe - I'm starting to understand this long forgotten concept again because here I'm finally re-starting a blog just because I feel like and I'm curious to see what happens.
Welcome to my world.